The Amazons’ quest to rescue their captured sisters continues to go badly, as they encounter the legendary Valkyries and learn that not all women share their views on sisterhood. Things get worse as someone in their midst appears to betray them, and a battle against the trolls forces them into a temporary alliance. But once that’s over, the Valkyries give the Amazons an ultimatum: to face death where they are or to engage in a deadly hunt where they’re the prey. Can Amazon heart overcome the sheer strength of the Valkyries? We review Odyssey Of The Amazons #3.
Okay. Prepare yourself for another round of long-winded pretentiousness with this latest issue of a series which deserves better.
Yes, the mostly unlikeable and poorly written Amazons continue to argue amongst themselves at all the wrong times, in what is presumably meant to be some kind dramatic conflict in Odyssey Of The Amazons #3. Maybe it’s because of their commander, Hessia, appears to be such a weak leader. She even settles an argument at one point with the age-old childhood temper tantrum of basically saying “If you can do a better job, fine, I quit”. This is during a pivotal life-and-death struggle, too. See the problem?
Or maybe it isn’t her fault at all. The arguments with the Valkyries follow pretty much the same pattern, with one side saying “We don’t trust you, we’ll kill you” and the other saying “You can trust us”, over and over again. Predictably, just when the reader starts to tire of this, the Valkyries cautiously decide to trust them. Cue a pointless surprise attack by the trolls just to break up the monotony, which is over almost instantly, and then they start the argument all over again.
It’s the storytelling equivalent of lather, rinse, repeat.
There are some almost laughable moments of writing both in the narrative captions and the dialogue, too. From the pointless paraphrasing of an overused Dylan Thomas poem to a Valkyrie actually uttering “Zounds!” as an expression, it’s impossible to take seriously. Some will argue that it’s a work of fiction, so it’s fine to just let accuracy slide. After all, they’re speaking English and there are no language barriers anyway, right? That argument can only get you so far, though, and here the suspension of disbelief crashes down completely.
A story about the Amazons is something which DC really needed to do after all these years. So why can’t they tell a good one? The Amazons have a rich history and deserve a time to shine, but this isn’t it. There’s no reason to care about them here, and certainly no reason to follow them on this adventure.